A mindful reset after a frustrating moment
Names in this article are pen names.
A le flo editorial practice, drawing on Elena’s essay “Tennis 4.0.” The meditation invitation below is an editorial addition.
You miss a shot you expected to make. An email lands badly. Something you have practised still feels difficult, and your attention stays with what went wrong.
Before deciding what happens next, you can take a small pause. There is no particular feeling you have to produce. You can be frustrated and still notice where you are.
A tennis story about returning
In “Tennis 4.0,” Elena describes learning through lessons, hitting partners, and challenging opponents. One opponent, Sophie, initially beat her without losing a game. Elena returned to coaching and practice, then faced Sophie again. A few games won did not immediately become a match won; more losses followed.
Eventually, Elena won a match against Sophie. But her essay also gives space to what grew around the competition: friendship, camaraderie, and the pleasure of playing. In the story, Sophie became a friend as well as an opponent.
Elena’s account is about tennis and learning. She does not describe a meditation practice. Her experience offers a starting point for a separate question we can bring into everyday life: after a disappointing moment, what would we like to give our attention to next?
Try a short pause
Mindfulness involves attending to the present without judging it; some meditation practices use breathing or sound as a focus. That is the limited sense of mindfulness used here. Read the NCCIH explanation of meditation and mindfulness.
Try this invitation when you have a safe moment to pause—between activities, after a meeting, or once you have stepped off the court. About a minute is enough to try it, but you do not need to time yourself.
- Notice what happened. Use a simple sentence: “I missed that shot,” or “That conversation was frustrating.” Notice if your mind adds a larger verdict about you. You do not have to settle that verdict right now.
- Feel your support. Sit comfortably and notice the chair beneath you or your feet meeting the floor. Let your hands rest. There is no special pose to achieve.
- Choose one thing to notice. Follow a few ordinary breaths without making them deeper or holding them. If breathing is not a comfortable focus, notice a nearby sound instead. Keep your eyes open if you prefer.
- Return when you notice the replay. Your mind may revisit the moment. Acknowledge that, then bring attention back to your chosen sensation or sound. You can repeat this without treating the wandering as another mistake.
- Choose one next action. Perhaps you need a break, a question answered, or another attempt. At work, it might be writing a clear first sentence. After tennis, it might be choosing one question to take to your next lesson.
You may still feel annoyed when you finish. The invitation is simply to notice your experience and choose what to do next. If the exercise becomes uncomfortable or distressing, stop and turn your attention to your surroundings; you do not need to push through it.
Give the pause a place in your day
You can also practise at an ordinary moment, before anything has gone wrong. Choose a familiar cue: closing your laptop, putting your shoes away, or sitting down before the day begins. Let that cue remind you to pause and notice.
If you already enjoy a gentle yoga posture, you might include a comfortable, familiar one in that time. Staying seated is also an option. Movement is optional, and there is no reason to work through pain to complete this invitation.
For a guided daily routine, le flo brings intention, breathing, posture, and meditation into one practice. Set an intention, attend to your breathing, spend time with posture, and continue into meditation. It gives returning to practice a place in your day, without requiring every session to feel the same.
This article and its short exercise are free. The guided le flo program is a paid membership. Explore le flo membership if you would like guidance through that daily sequence. For a free introduction to the basics, read how to start meditation.